i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
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