puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Threesome in a minivan. New low
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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