You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
It's rum buckets o'clock
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize