He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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