i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
