god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Randomize
