Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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