Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Randomize
