She is in my trunk
wanna go halves on a baby?
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
