question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
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