I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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