So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
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