we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
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