i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Randomize