so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
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