I puked a lego.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
