great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
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I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
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Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I came so hard my ears popped.
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