WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
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