its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Randomize
