11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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