so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
