great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
