I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
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