the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Randomize
