just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
