so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
everyone is single if you try hard enough
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
