I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
