quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Randomize
