why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
