You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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