The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Randomize
