Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
