I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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