It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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