I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
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