you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
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