Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
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Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
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Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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