I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize