3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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