my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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