I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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