Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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