I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
