why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
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