drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
When are your genitals available?
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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