Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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