Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
