I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
