the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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