I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
