We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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